…feel like this needs to be my motto for sanity for a million reasons. I must learn to forget about it….pretty much everything really…
I spent the entire day yesterday longing to write. I had beautiful thoughts and well put-together words that ached to be typed. Every spare moment of thought in my head which I had was spent making little attempts to organize and collect these wonderful thoughts so that once I could sit at my computer, I could best manage to get them out in an efficient way.
Seems to me that by the time I get to be alone with my thoughts and at my computer, I’m so full of a million other things, that I no longer recall what I wanted to say or feel I have anything at all to say anyway. Is this typical of people who enjoy writing…people who feel compelled to write?
I’ve so much that I hope to say someday…so much that I pray I’ll get to write efficiently about before my life is over… and I chronically feel frustrated and interrupted so that by the time I get to attempt this, I’ve nothing going through my head except frustration and believe it or not, I don’t ever intend or actually want to write only about frustrating or painful things.
So maybe if I can’t ever “get it said” for whatever reason….perhaps that’s an indication that none of it needs written or said anyway? It feels empty to think that my one passion in this world has resorted to nothing but a venting of negative feelings and challenges because I can’t organize my thoughts or time well enough to ever accomplish anything but…
Ahhhhh….yet another venting…!