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1.Marni A.: The original “mean girl” and my best friend from the 4th grade. You gave me grape lip gloss and earrings.  You stabbed me in the back 472 times and married my high school crush- who you always hated.

2.Mrs. Gerber: Kindness and compassion teaching the 1st grade.  You were so beautiful and soft. First ever to show me caring and compassion.  Innocence wants to be you when it grows up. You seemed to understand what no one would.

3,”Sport”: Your smile was infectous.  You made me a club member of your private club and except when you pulled my hair, you were always nice to me.  You were always in trouble, but I sensed something so gentle.

4.Dawn:  you had the style and pizazz which I lacked and our mother’s love.  All my teachers even loved you first and most.  You were quiet and supportive and I longed to be like you although you’ll never know.

5.Darlene:  The icon of my permanent failure to please and the master of my unlovable-ness.  I never cleaned the house right.  and I was too silly and child-like.  I’m sorry you were getting older.  Overwhelmingly  beautiful and sadly prideful.

6.Mr. Janitor: You always smiled at me when no one else did.  I looked forward to your smiles.  Forgotten papers to show my mom. You gently carried me to my desk. My “Monday panties” were not for you to touch.

7.Gary Neptune:  Seminole bull stud, dark haired big muscled farm boy.  I was too tall and skinny, you dwarfed me. I first felt safety around you.  You were so gigantic and I wanted to  pretend I was a grown up.

8.Bill A.:  Football star, ultimate bad boy.  Gross and unattractive, you lack all social grace or conscience.  Gigantic as well, you make me sick.  Thief of my innocence.  You left me bleeding and bruised and then laughed in my face.

9.Tom G.: Smallest and youngest of the “Gigantic trio” and my best friend’s boyfriend.  I always had a tiny crush on you and you wanted to use me.  Josie’s on a vacation far away.  I refused you.  How could you?

10.Brian:  You were funny and so flattering.  Parked by the Mehaffey’s, you wanted to lose your virginity to me!  You were so sweet and desperate for me.  Did you not know I was virginal and  pretending to have experience?

11.Chris Stemm:My sister loved you and I worshipped you.  So calming and funny, we could laugh for hours about the silliest stuff.  To me, you will always be UB40,  red wine, innocence respected and proof that platonic friendship exists.

12.Greg Moody: Cool-mix tapes and my sister’s Florida wedding.  The epitome of intelligence, who would have thought that we’d connect so well that I could fall asleep sitting next to you? Your respect was an inspiration.  You didn’t forget!

13.Tracy Cross: When the new girl had no friends, you weren’t afraid to befriend me. Loud and boisterous, you wanted to be  me and I fervently wished to be a little more like you. You’re my enduring and unusual friendship.

14. Peggy: Spunky and sassy, never showing an ounce of fear or weakness, you’re my icon for strength.  Sitting on the dock of the bay while your boyfriend sat in jail, I wanted to hold your hand through the breakdown

15.Heidi B.Jealous, back stabbing little troll.  Cheap blonde highlights and jealousy are not attractive on you.  You have no idea how much I needed a friend. Your gossippy lies did not defeat me.  He still wanted me after all.

16. Brandie Z.:You define the most beautiful insecurity.  I vehemently defended you. Your enormous ego still scares me.  You smiled as you stole my happiness and sunk your teeth into my heart. I think you even laughed. Vampire energy-sucker

17.Melissa Peterson:  You’re a mean one, Ms. Peterson!  For all your “smarts and experience”, your bitterness far outweighs any good you could ever do.  You’re without a doubt, the worst possible boss ever.  You’d criticize perfection itself.  Seek therapy immediately.

18.  Helen:  ADHD driven, you have the kindest heart I’ve ever seen.  Your energy level  makes me dizzy and your optimism is both annoying and endearing.  Sharing space with you has been an experience and a journey.  I thank you

19. Kyleen:  Smart and motivated, compassionate and tough, beautiful and sensible, you truly have no idea how wonderful you are.  your friendship has saved me from myself on many an occasion.  Your respect and encouragement inspires me to keep going.

20. Pam: Petite spoiled suburban housewife.  Cold and aloof, you’re only passionate about your criticisms!  I feel sorry for you because you seem to struggle to feel anything  and I wonder what happened to you.  You could have  much more.

21. Jeanie: Your snobby “queen of the world” routine was fine until I saw your cruelty clear. You ripped me for trying so hard and sang my praises when I gave up.  Some efforts are threatening to the status quo.

22. Dave K.:  Unconditional eternal love.  Soft giggles, smiles, warm fuzzies, pink floating bubbles, everything beautiful.  Lies, rumors, betrayals, meddlesome jealous people, overwhelming pride and lust…  yin, yang.  Roller coaster of lies, destructive paths, sadly swerving from the intoxication of joy. 

23. Troy (daves friend):  It’s okay if you are gay.  Would help make sense of the gross exaggerations and demonic meddlings you’ve added to the fucked-up soup.  Blowing kisses and licking your lips at me is disgustingly cruel. Grow up already!

24.Greg D.:   I’m sorry you’ve been so disappointed in females, but I’m not those girls and I’m not ready for the games to begin. I need to say good bye before you get in too deeply and hate me too.

25.  Lexi:  You’re wise and strong like I’ve never been, yet you’ve someow maintained a kind heart also.  You are beauty and grace with the zest of an unlimited potential.  You were the first to gently steal my aching heart.

26. Savannah:Sunny bananas, giggles, and spunky silliness.  You light up my world like a million candles in a hall of mirrors!  Your simplicity is inspiring.  Your intelligence is hopeful.  Hold onto that confidence forever. You complete me.

27. Mark:  Respect and gratitude times 1 billion for the man you’ve become and the source of enduring strength and compassion I never imagined we’d share.  You’re starting to understand me and you always want to help. You are amazing!

28. Scott B.: You never meant to boil me.  You were young and confused in ways I’d never imagined at that tender age.  You are reliable and so very sincere.  Your love helped me transition in single motherhood. You’re a great friend!

29.  Jim Artman:  What the hell?  Hope you ironed through some of your psychiatric issues.  Or did you just move on to beat more women?  Are you even alive today?  If so, I hope you’ve found peace and a tolerant woman

30. Corey L.: Creepy sex fiend friend , making rude gestures at me at 19. And trying to steal sex from me while I was trustfully asleep.  You frighten me and I can’t be your friend anymore.  I hope you find peace.

31.Kathy G.:  Treating me like family, was more than I’d ever guessed would come of this friendship!  You are so resilient and matter-of-fact.  With you I can laugh at things that just aren’t funny.  You are sunny acceptance.

32. Carolyn:  I adore you.  You always had such strength and conviction.  Smart, sassy, and fun, you are light as a feather and as beautiful as anything.  I’m so lucky to have yourlove and  friendship after all this time!

33. Mitch May:  I am sorry. I was too young and too screwed up to love and appreciate your love and compassion.  You showed me kindness in the face of my weakness and you held strong. You deserved  better than me.

34. Laurann:  Grams.  I wanted you to be my mother.  To love me like you love your son.  You listened when I was pregnant and scared. You offered support when I was lost and alone.  Thank you for being there.

35. Big casino girl (mark’s lil friend);  Gosh you were so jealous it just oozed out your pores, like slime from a snail.  Mark thought you were cool with my panties.  Your bitterness came through in the end.  You are nothing, just like the others.

36. Jennifer Skelton: Bright red lipstick and a fabulous smile. My spunky college roomie!  Our laughter still resonates in my heart when I think of you.  I believed in your friendship.  You are laughter in Memphis and late night pillow talks

37.Laura: Tiny blonde with five children. I  thought you were so much more than your horrible reputation.  You were a friend, but drugs and crazy life issues won in the end.  You proved everyone right.  I loved you  anyway.

38.Julie I.: Little curly brunette, shame you couldn’t see yourself as I did.  Your insecurities and addictions eventually made you the impossible friend.  You carry yourself well as you live up to the white trash status you hold yourself to.

39 Adrianne: My neighbor and friend for so long.  I respect your unlimited ability and fear your desperation. You overcame so much and in the end, seek out exactly what you narrowly escaped. I understand the reasons for your selfishness.

40 Jeff Pego:  Charisma and breathtaking smiles.  Cocaine and pot run your life.  You are deceit and pity with all your untapped potential which you use to carry on your charade.  The ultimate has-been, wanna-be.  Get over yourself already.

41.Coral:  Hypocritical jealous mother-in-law.  I stupidly believed in your Godly goodness, as you subtly twisted knives in my heart and took advantage of my longing for a mother.  The hidden darkness of sad conniving hearts is frightening.

42.Chuck Kennedy: I wish your son could learn from your mistakes.  How did he miss inheriting your honor?  You were kind to me. I’ll always remember you fondly.  I sometimes wish you knew the truth. I envy your fatherly devotion.

43. Dennis H.: Oh Dennis!  Since you were a little boy, your adoration and respect flattered me.  Are you like Jeff or is he like you?  Gripped by addiction, you say all the right things and continue the cycle of insanity.

44. Dave(from Memphis):  Studying history in my apartment, I thought you were gorgeous.  In the midst of so many choices and past regrets, you were the filet mignon I wouldn’t allow myself to have. I often wonder how you turned out?

45.  Greg from Cinti:  I’m sorry I didn’t appreciate you more.  You treated me like a princess and I didn’t know what that meant.  I was immaturely young and inexperienced.  I shouldn’t have made you sleep on the floor so many times!

46. Tom Smith:  My law-partner in crime, I took for granted that you adored me.  You were my following puppy, as I frantically searched for my identity.  Your devotion to me still warms my heart.  I pray you’re adored now.

47.  Melissa McCauslin:  We were whiskey Bent and Hell Bound!  You were graceful intelligence with a wild side.  You had a balance I’ve always lacked.  I valued your friendship.  I’m sorry I ran away from it. I miss you so much!

48. Kris Bohn: Yes, I fell for your pretentious poser routine, even as I saw right though it.  You pretended to be everything you never would and I let you believe I believed you.  You define my desperate moments of insecurity.

49.  Arlene (law firm):  Breathless beauty with so much charm and grace.  I couldn’t believe you would befriend me.  Nothing ruffled you and you had the sensible practicality I lacked.  Your misplaced insecurity stunned me.  I admired you more than you know!

50.  Clothes stealers:  You stupid boys!  What’s the matter with you “fine upstanding” athletes?  Had you nothing better to do than to steal Melissa’s summer clothes?  Pillars of the community who pillage female clothes?  You define an unbelievable Jerry Springer show.

51. Small town sheriff: “Teach you’s a lesson?”  REALLY?!? With your sexist ignorance, you disgrace the law and provide the definition of a small mind trying to run the land.  Your nonchalance was biting and your lack of proper grammar was irritating.

52. BK Rodney: Boss of the BK!  Your adoration of me made me much hated by all the others.  I secretly loved the special treatment and delighted in the way you thought I sparkled.  I needed someone to like me best.

53.  Prof: Your intelligence and wit were so incredibly sexy!  You made the driest logic and reasoning interesting and juicy.  I couldn’t help but stare in admiration sometimes.  I tried not to give in to that gravitational pull.  Compassionate you.

54. Daddy: You gave me a card with turtles on it for my 8th birthday and signed it “All my love”.  I slept with that card under my pillow for nearly two years.  It meant so much.  I’ve never forgotten.

55. Jerry W.:  The first of everything for me.  I loved you in my childish, immature, never-been-loved before way.  You were fighting your own demons and never meant to hit me so hard. Your apology was valuable to me.

56. Tammy S.: Proof that insanity is also cruel and charming.  You make trust and friendship feel like you’ve thrown yourself into a ferocious  lion’s mouth.  You must be lost.  You devastated me but I’ll always be grateful for the  laughs.

57. Mrs. Brown (4th grade):  I feared getting you as a teacher!  All summer I’d begged God to give me a different one.  You were a terrific teacher. Horn rimmed glasses and your quiet nature created my first experience with respect and honor.

58.

59. JoAnn: Neighborly goodness or so I thought.  Still haven’t figured you. Six years next door.  I took up for you and still you bashed me behind my back.  No apologies. you felt you were the victim? How so?

60. Sarah O: So many laughs and fun days on the beach!  We fought the rolling waves, holding hands to stay standing and laughing every moment.  I thought we would be friends forever…still don’t know what happened. I miss you.

61.Sandy Butler: With your Aquanet hairspray and clingy clothes, you gave “tan” a new meaning.  All the boys fell instantly in love.  You may have been really a friend.  I learned what jealousy was and I’m still so very sorry.

62. Bo B.: Didn’t figure out what “Boing” meant  until I was much older.  Advanced beyond your years, I secretly liked your mean tough streak. White blonde curly hair and the raspiest voice ever.  you were naughty. I wished to be

63. Dave Lewis: My first friend. Forbidden. I’ll always believe you  cared.   Kind when I wasn’t sure what kindness should be.  Gentle  in spite of my chaotic and hateful mother.  I needed your persistence.  My faith died when you were forbidden.

64. Andrew Z.: Wild and crazy bad boy reputation. Classic rock, classic cars, riding home in the last days before summer.  I was just one of a million no body’s to you. You’re my second lesson ever in my dispensible nature.

65. Heather Chuich

66. Stacie R.

67. Lisa Bowlin

68. Christy Crawford

69. Jack Cartner

70. boy in the mall 6th grade:

71. Rita Clark:

72. Wade Clark

73. Ron Bielski:

74.Mike Wagers

75.  Aunt Linda

76. Aunt Desiree

77. Jonas

78. Drew

79 Uncle Ted:

80.  Michael (Jewish boy)

81. Bodybuilder/stripper

82. Dante

83: Heather B.

84. Eric Pego

85.Baseball field man w/a hoodie:

86.  Desi’s Ob/Gyn:

87.  Detective? (Jim A.)

88. Hope (from subway)

89.Angie

90.  Emily

91.  Dan Yako

92.  Mark VanderWall

93.  Judy K.

94.  Matt B.

95. Mark (writer/photo)

96.  Old man Photographer/swinger (I’m 19)

97. Cindy

98. John Kroll

99.  Tom Kroll

100. Tara Kemble

101.  (Most searched for on the Internet one): Brief acquaintance.  You must be popular in some way since people searching for you KEEP coming to my blog!  Lifetimes ago, I had a blast with you and often wonder how life has turned out for you?  Blessings!

102. Lawyer from D&S:

103. Jealous secy from West Shore:

104.Judy Chapman

105.Kristus

106. Larry T.

107. Doug Weiser

108. Janda

109. Jimmy (Jandas friend)

110. Jake

111. Grandma

112. Dr. Patti Dauser:

113. Brian (ex)

114. Brian (SL)

115. Aunt Linda

116.  Mike A.